Adoption is, by far, the hardest things I’ve ever done. I’ve gone through the process twice now and have two beautiful, perfect daughters that I am so grateful for. But there were days I felt like quitting and throwing in the towel. There were days I was angry because the process felt cruel and unfair. There were times when everything felt reckless and out-of-control which
I used songs and quotes a lot through the waiting of infertility and the adoption process. I leaned on them when I was feeling down and uninspired. I had them saved to my phone, wrote them in my planner, pasted them to my mirror, anywhere I could bump in to them throughout the day. Surrounding myself with positivity was important for my mental health and
I could have called this “1000 Things Not to Say To a Parent By Adoption” but I don’t have all day and neither do you. As parents by adoption, we’ve heard it all. We’ve been approached by random strangers asking about the details of our adoptions or questions about why our skin doesn’t match. We’ve probably been offended and embarrassed in a million different ways
Perhaps one of the biggest worries that hopeful parents have is that they won’t bond with their new baby. As adoptive parents, we don’t get 9+ months to grow our belly, feel kicks, learn their habits or feel their hiccups. Instead, our months are usually filled with unknowns, anxiety, fear, excitement, hesitant preparation, and a lot of waiting. I’m here to tell you good news. You
Post-adoption depression, much like post-partum depression describes the stress, anxiety, and emotions that may follow after your adoption takes place. Although it may not be a formally recognized diagnosis, it is very real. It’s typically preset in new mothers by adoption after the placement has happened or the adoption is finalized. And possibly the hardest part is that no one tells you, no one warns
I am a mama of two beautiful girls. They are now 20 months old and 14 months old. That’s right – only six months apart. Life is wildly adventurous and beautifully chaotic with two toddlers but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. My daughters have brought me more love, lessons, and adventure than I could have imagined. Their relationship, even at such a young age,
I almost laughed out loud when I titled this “easy peasy” because adoption is far, far from that. So, please, let me clarify. When we decided to adopt, I knew nothing about the process. I was completely inundated and discouraged by all the things that Google told me. When you search “how to adopt”, Google comes back with 111,000,000 results. Amongst these are paid ads,
Ohhh, the holidays. The dreaded, joyful, stressful, crazy holidays. This time of year is magical but stressful for many. The gathering, gifts, decorations, expectations – it’s overwhelming. But a season of joy can become a season of (more) pain for those who desire a child but still have empty arms. If you’re on the path of infertility or adoption and still waiting for that perfect
I did none of these things. I learned the hard way. I had to backtrack and figure these things out after we had adopted and experienced some of the most gut-wrenching days I’ll ever face. I believe there were many reasons I learned these lessons in this manner. I understand it served a purpose. But my passion has become to help guide other adoptive families
Glennon Doyle Melton said it best. “Life is never all brutal or all beautiful. It’s both, all the time. Life is brutiful.” This is most certainly true for adoption. The overwhelming brutality and pure majesty it brings will perhaps provide you with a new perspective on life that few others experience. When we choose this journey, we do not get to choose what we experience