My Favorite Mother’s Day Gifts
Mother’s Day….the big day women either enjoy or dread. I know it is a difficult day for many women for various reasons. As I have listened to my friends in the adoption world I usually hear how Mother’s Day brings pain. It is a hard day for some birth mothers and infertile women, both longing for their child, both feeling a sense of loss.
I remember each year hoping the next year I would be a mother. But I can’t say I didn’t like mother’s day. I still had a mother to celebrate, a mother in law to celebrate as well as all of my grandmothers, sisters, aunts and women in my life who “mothered” me in ways only they could. There were sad moments and moments I just wanted to be recognized for being a hopeful mother. After all, I was trying so hard to be able to be a mother. I enjoyed the gifts and love my husband poured upon me. He was always sensitive and sweet….always recognizing me on this special day. I am so thankful to have a husband who loves me, for me, regardless of my ability or inability to procreate. What a blessing!
There are special gifts….my favorite mother’s day gifts, I’ve received from my children’s birth mothers. The gifts came written on paper or typed out in an email…words that spoke directly to my heart. One of these precious gifts said:
“I find it so hard to find the words to try and describe to you what you mean to me.
You are the mom that I one day hope to be.”
I remember reading these words and sobbing. The letters these amazing women have shared with me are most precious to me and I feel their love in each and every one of them! What an amazing gift to have them in my life!!!
Healing happened to my heart when I read those words. It was as if my heart was waiting for those words to give me complete and total permission to be, not just a mother, but my child’s mother. I am amazed how connected my heart is to the heart of each of my children’s birth mothers. There is something sacred about the relationship, the trust and the sharing of this word “Mother”. I would have never thought years ago how sharing my title would bring me such joy! It wasn’t by mere coincidence or just need, these amazing women came into my life…it was by divine design. Only one who could see beyond the present could have created this kind of love and these kind of miracles!
On Mother’s Day I have much to celebrate. No, I never had the opportunity to be pregnant and give life but I have the opportunity to share my love and my life with more family than I ever imagined. I adopted each of these women as mine as they placed their child…our child in my arms. They are so important to me!!! They are my reward for going through so much to be a Mother.
May each birth mother know they are loved, cherished and a gift. May they know how their words and love heal your heart. If you haven’t told them lately make sure you don’t wait another day! Extend your hand and allow your love to multiply! Allow your words and your love to help heal their heart!
Happy Mother’s Day to each woman reading this post.
Motherhood isn’t just a title…it is a verb! What a great opportunity we have to mother all who come into our life.
Brenda Horrocks is a mother of four children through adoption.
She promotes adoption, foster care and Utah’s Safe Haven Law through blogging, public speaking and writing. She enjoys time with family, reading books, running, gardening and movies.
You can visit her blog here.