What’s Right for you as a Birth Mother? Open or Closed Adoption?
When going through the adoption process, there are so many decisions that you, as a birth
mother, must make. Trying to create an adoption plan can be overwhelming. One of the first
decisions that may be weighing you down is whether you want an open adoption or a closed
adoption. This is a big decision that we at Forever Bound Adoption want to make a little easier
for you. Since adoption questions are common, we’ve laid out some of the facts about open
adoption and closed adoption so you can make the decision and adoption plan for your child.
Let’s start with closed adoption. Closed adoption means that there is no contact between
you, the adoptive family, and the child. Oftentimes this also means that there is no contact before
the adoption is finalized, there are not many details shared about you to the adoptive family and
vice versa. Depending on the state where you place and the extent of the closed adoption, once
the child is 18-21 years old, they may be able to find information about you and possibly meet
you. Closed adoptions used to be the norm in the adoption world, but research has found that
open adoptions may be healthier for the child, and many birth mothers nowadays want to see
how their child is growing and have the opportunity to build a relationship with the child as well
as the adoptive parents.
Open adoption has a vague definition, and it varies depending on what both parties want.
Each adoption is unique and therefore each circumstance within open adoption is going to be
different family to family. Open adoption means that you, as a birth mother, would be able to
know the adoptive family, they will know you and you will know your child as they grow up. Each open adoption is different. For some, open adoption means that adoptive families send pictures and videos occasionally to the birth mother. For others it may mean that the adoptive family and birth mother gets together once a year, or goes on vacation together. It all depends on you and the family. The level of openness is determined by both. If at first you know you want an open adoption, but you do not know how open you want it, express that to your agency and adoptive family. Down the road if you want a closer relationship, you can discuss that with the
family and make it work. In this process, it’s all about being clear and doing what is best for you and your child.
To find out more information on adoption and what is right for you, check out our birth mother
videos or contact Forever Bound Adoption at 801-821-1354